Lesbians spinoffs that should have been

Diff'rent Strokes begat The Facts of Life. Happy Days begat Mork and Mindy. Hercules: The Legendary Journeys begat Xena: The Warrior Princess. Sometimes the spinoff show withers and dies, but sometimes it outshines the original in ratings and accolades. It all depends on which characters the Powers That Be decide to set apart from the rest and what scenarios they place them in.

To my knowledge, there has never been a lesbian spinoff -- i.e. a show created around a lesbian character plucked from a pre-existing show -- unless you count the upcoming L Word spinoff (and that chicken ain't hatched yet, as far as I'm concerned). This is a crying shame. So here, in no particular order, are five characters/pairs that should have got their own show:

1. Carol and Susan (Friends)

Appearing in a dozen episodes scattered over six seasons, this pair may just hold the record for most enduring lesbian relationship on TV. (But I'm far too lazy to research that.) They were minor characters, showing up occasionally to act as foils for Ross (Carol's ex-husband), whose animosity toward Susan (the woman who stole his wife) got big laughs.

But even though they were only there to generate or complicate storylines for someone else, it was always clear to me that these women had lives of their own that we never got to see -- jobs, a son, friends of their own. They should have had their own sitcom that mined all the potential humour of being gay women in New York City.

2. Kim Legaspi (ER)


Kim was a psychiatrist who acted as a catalyst for series regular Kerry Weaver's coming out; the two fell in love and Kerry struggled to keep it a secret from her staff and her hospital superiors, afraid that being gay would hurt her career. Kim ended the relationship when it became clear that Kerry put the job first, and before long Kim left the hospital altogether.

This pairing had a huge lesbian fan base (thanks in large part to Elizabeth Mitchell, who played Kim, being drop-dead gorgeous). More than a few of us wonder what happened to Kim when she walked out of Kerry's life. She was a bit of a lothario and wasn't above playing fast and loose with ethics and the law in order to help her patients. She should have had a primetime drama that showed her making a new start in a strange city, trying to get over Kerry and find true love. There could be lots of brooding and hot misguided sex.

3. Deirdre and Monet (Will & Grace)


In a single episode, this pair made me laugh more than the titular characters did in whole seasons. Will and Grace became apartment flippers and accidentally incurred the wrath of Deirdre and Monet, rivals in the field. This sitcom didn't do much lesbian material in its eight seasons, since its two gay male leads were not fond of dykes, so the showdown with a lesbian power couple was a breath of fresh air. The dynamic between flakey Monet and charismaric Deirdre was hilarious. Edie Falco stole the show when Deirdre put the moves on straight-but-powerless-to-resist Grace in an attempt to destroy her partnership with Will.

If these conniving-but-loveable characters had been spun off into their own show, they could have ruled a real estate empire from a chic East Side apartment, with Deirdre having to rescue Monet from various madcap adventures (several of which would involve near-infidelities that Deirdre would grudgingly forgive, as she did Monet's crush on Will).

4. Jean Kelly (Ellen)

This was another one-off character, a waitress whom Ellen met on a road trip while she was trying to get over a (temporary) breakup with Laurie. Jean was cute and flirty and definitely interested in Ellen, but nothing ever came of it because Ellen decided she had to try again with Laurie. Poor Jean! She deserved to get a happy ending too. That's why she should have got her own sitcom that focused on her job at the restaurant, a greasy spoon that's way behind the times, and the conflicts that arise when Jean, a vegetarian, tries to prevent the customers from ordering meat.

5. Willow Rosenberg (Buffy the Vampire Slayer)


Buffy, like Friends, did actually spawn a spinoff, but it was mopey vampire Angel who got to break out instead of my favourite character on the show, Willow the lesbian witch. Not that I would have wanted Willow to leave part-way through, as Angel did -- she was far too central to the storylines, and besides, she wasn't even gay till Season 4. My imaginary Willow spinoff would pick up after the end of Buffy and let her get out from under the slayer's shadow. (I always much prefered her to the title character anyway.)

Actually, I heard talk that a Faith spinoff was considered, though how far it ever got I don't know. From the sounds of things it would have been very similar in premise to Angel, Faith being all redemption-minded like he was -- she would go around doing good deeds and dealing with the aftermath of having been kind of a bad guy for a while. I totally would have watched it because Faith was my second favourite character on the show, but I think Willow had more potential for exploring new territory.

Who would Willow be if she lived apart from the Scooby Gang? What kind of choices would she make if she was in charge and not just Buffy's "big gun"? And most importantly, would she stay with her kickass slayer girlfriend Kennedy, who was clearly not the best match for her despite some serious sparks?

I think spinoffs might just be the key to greater lesbian visibility on TV. It's hard to get a gay show on the air, but wouldn't it be easier if the characters had already been well received on a successful show? Maybe Nikki & Nora would have been picked up if the title cops had previously appeared in an episode of, I don't know, Boston Legal. I bet execs would be a lot more comfortable with lesbian content that had the proven track record of a Buffy the Vampire Slayer or a Friends behind it. Of course these shows have been gone for too long now; they don't have the same cachet. Writers and producers need to move on these characters as soon as the shows end. Come on! Let's get some more girls who like girls on the air!